They Win Some, They Lose Some

The games: Portland Winterhawks vs. Saskatoon Blades (WHL). Tampa Bay Lightning vs. Pittsburgh Penguins.

The final scores: Saskatoon 4, Portland 3. Pittsburgh 5, Tampa Bay 1.

So we won't be getting fitted for a glass slipper just yet: You can read all about the Portland Winterahawks game here: www.oregonlive.com/hawks. It involves the end of our winning streak, Gene Simmons, Riley Boychuk's rising star continuing to shine, and future NHL draftee Ty Rattie getting back on the scoring train. Bonus question for Portland fans: has Sven Bartschi gone even so much as one game without scoring or assisting? I think not, but feel free to correct me.

Meanwhile back in Pittsburgh, somebody planted a new flower in the garden: In his return from temporary exile, Marc-Andre Fleury racked up his 150th career win, stopped 15 of 16 shots and earned the first star of the night. Also racking up some impressive stats: Sidney Crosby's goal and assist put him three points behind Steven Stamkos' league-leading total. But the action didn't really get started until the second period, when the Pens scored two goals within 27 seconds of one another (thank you, Pascal Dupuis and Alex Goligoski). Back in Stanley Cup form, Max Talbot went top shelf with a nice one in the third. But really, it was all about the flower last night. Welcome back.

Speaking of Crosby: Did you ever notice that the people who rip him for being a whiner are by their actions, whining themselves? Discuss.

And this is why I am now addicted to everything Guy Boucher says and does: When talking about his team last night to NHL.com, he applauded them for giving everything they've got and that's all he can ask for.

Mini bummer alert/the NHL needs to invent better mitts: Honkin' tall French Captain is down with a broken hand. It's the Jordan Staal syndrome. No sooner does Lecavalier get back on track from injuries and a low-scoring season than he goes down again. Therefore, I will think nothing but good thoughts for a speedy recovery and comeback.

Oh right, the rule: NHLPA Collective Bargaining Agreement, Article 12, Salary Arbitration.

12.9, Rules of Procedure, (g) Evidence: This is all about the kinds of evidence that the artibrator can request, including: overall performance and statistics of the player in the previous season; number of games played and injury or illnesses; length of service to the Club; overall contribution to the competitive sucess or failure of the Club in the preceding season; any special qualities of leadership or public appeal not inconsistent with the fulfillment of his reponsibilities as a playing member of his team.

But this is the best part: In the absence of a written agreement, the parties shall, in good faith, take all necessary steps in advance of the start of the hearing to jointly confirm and memorialize the occurrence of any events described in paragraphs (A), (B), and (C) above. The steps shall include, but are not limited to, a conference call by and between representatives of the parties no later than three (3) hours before the hearing begins.

Morals of the story:

The game: So, in other words, if you are a lazy whiner who didn't contribute to points, assists, didn't display good leadership or all around sportsmanship or who isn't well liked by the public, forget it. Why are you even complaining? Also, in good faith they will memorialize the preceding events? Good luck with that .

Life: Corporate America needs salary arbitration. Think of all the senior vice presidents with fancy degrees who would be weeded out when evidence is presented that clearly proves they faked it until they made it to the top. Or all the hard working middle managers who suddenly climb the ladder because the company figures out that they are, in fact, the ones running the show. It boggles the mind.

Up next: Article 12.10, Walk-Away Rights for Player-Elected Salary Arbitration.

Winning Streaks and Barbecues and Comebacks, Oh My!

Going streaking: The Portland Winterhawks extend their winning streak to 10 games behind game tying and a game winning OT goal from Brad Ross. They also scored the first and second goals of the 5-4 game against the Regina Pats.

It's easy to see how they bred Jordan Eberle and Carter Ashton: The Regina Pats must eat a completely different brand of Wheaties than everyone else. Because I must admit, they do kick ass.

You can read all about it here: www.oregonlive.com/hawks. And have a giggle at my expense: last night as of 10 pm or so, the OT goal on whl.ca was credited to Ryan Johansen. Nice...ah well, I knew it would happen sooner or later.

Maybe the Pens can borrow Guy Boucher and his sports psychology master's degree for a few games: Boston Bruins 7, Pittsburgh Penguins 4. Five of Boston's goals were scored in the third period. If I hadn't been listening to the Hawks extend their winning streak to 10 games, I would have had to turn the NHL game off. Because it truly was physically painful. I love the Pens and I will never officially give up on them. Ever. But dudes, could you pace yourselves on the losing games? I'm already trying to keep the gray hair and wrinkles and other signs of aging at bay.

Now, normally I'd be like what the heck?: But since they are the future home of Portland Winterhawk and Number 4 overall draft pick Ryan Johansen, kudos to Columbus for barbecuing St. Louis 8 - 1. On the the other hand, the Blues are the future home of Winterhawk Captain Brett Ponich, so if this happens in future, it will be a major dilemma pour moi.

NHL Draftee to watch: Riley Boychuk, drafted 208th in the 2010 Entry Draft after missing last year's draft due to injury and subsequent surgery. He's on the upswing with a capital U, he scored the game tying goal against Regina tonight and I do believe he meets the Buffalo Sabres' minimum height requirement (which is what, like, 8 feet tall in skates?). Ok, he's really 6'5", and also...when he's not scoring, nobody gets in your face like Riley. I don't know why opponents even bother. He could eat you for breakfast. Don't even try it.

Morals of the story:

A year ago, the Portland Winterhawks were just another losing team on the comeback trail. This year, we are #1 in the WHL, #1 in our Division, #2 in the CHL and the winning streak continues as the boys hit the road tonight for Saskatoon. Nino is back. Ryan is back. Fans are starting to come back. It's a good time to be a hockey fan in Portland. Meanwhile the team that may one day employ prospect and Winterhawk Taylor Peters is out there somewhere, not sleeping, not happy and not winning. Evgeni Malkin alone is his own hard act to follow. Throw a flu bug and Jordan Staal's injury in there, and there goes the comeback neighborhood. But here's the deal, and I know 'cause I've done it myself: 1) The one advantage of losing is there's nowhere to go but up. 2) Losing in the NHL isn't totally losing. Of the 210 players drafted each year, only a portion are fortunate enough to go on to major league careers. 3) The only way to learn how to rally is to live through it and to do it.

So here's my evil plan for a Pittsburgh Penguins comeback. And I didn't even have to earn a master's degree in sports psychology and get a bad ass scar on my face: pond hockey. Forget about rankings and cliches and off-day press scrums. I say freeze over Mario Lemieux's pool, slap on some mismatched gear and get out there. If possible, get your moms to come over and drag you out of bed and drive you there. Anything that reminds you of why you did this in the first place and why you love it. What do you have to lose? Oh right. Nothing.

Next up: Checking to see if my evil plan worked and the next section of Article 12, Salary Arbitration.

Heads or Tails?

The games: Tampa vs. Toronto, Anaheim vs. San Jose, Portland Winterhawks vs. Swift Current Broncos (WHL).

The scores: Tampa 4, Toronto 0. Three of those goals were scored in the first period, two of which were scored within 29 seconds of one another. So the evil Boucher "don't mess with me I have a bad ass mystery scar AND a master's degree in messing with players' heads" plan is working. I like it. Carry on.

Anaheim 2, San Jose 1 end of second period.

Portland 4, Swift Current 2.

On the other hand: In another couple of years, I must be pro Toronto all the time, because Portland Winterhawk Brad Ross will be playing for them. I've even purchased a Toronto Maple Leafs Christmas stocking in preparation.

Repeat performance: On Saturday night, Ryan Johansen topped off the Winterhawks' scoring with an empty netter that helped us beat the Everett Silvertips 4 - 2. He scored two goals tonight, and the second was an exact duplicate of the Everett game: an empty netter that resulted in the same final score.

The rule: NHLPA Collective Bargaining Agreement. Article 12, Section 12.7, Scheduling.

If you thought the NHL was a highly organized, professional, impeccably marketed, global sports marketing and sales empire that runs like clockwork with the help of Stanley Cup champions, Harvard-educated lawyers and Wharton MBAs: Forget that. 12.7 (c) After the NHL and NHLPA have compiled the Player List, salary arbitrations shall be scheduled as follows:

(i) The NHL and NHLPA shall flip a coin to determine which party shall begin the process set forth in subsection (ii) below.

(ii) The party winning the coin flip set forth in subsection (i) above shall select a Player from the Player List and shall assign such Player to a particular Salary Arbitrator on one of such Salary Arbitrator's available dates, as indicated in the Salary Arbitration Calendar.

Morals of the story:

The game: No, that's not a typo. Salary arbitration is one of the most contentious, costly and time-consuming activities in this agreement and the scheduling and selection of the top notch grade A individual who is going to decide your financial worth and fate is at the mercy of a coin toss. If I'd known working for the NHL didn't require a degree in sports marketing, I would have applied for my dream job years ago.

Life: What if your fate in life was decided by a coin toss, and you had no control over it whatsover? Would you be relieved because you weren't responsible for the outcome? Glad that someone else decided for you, instead of making your own stupid choices? Disappointed because it wasn't what you wanted, dreamed, or hoped? There is a part of me that wishes I didn't have to choose between one fate and another in life, or that I had the kind of talent where only one fate awaited me in life. But alas, I was left to my own devices. Some of that was good, some of it was utterly forgettable, a lot of it was memorable and some of it was just plain stupid. But in the end, if I'd taken any other road, I wouldn't be here. And for right now, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

Next up: NHLPA Collective Bargaining Agreement. Article 12, Salary Arbitration. 12.9, Rules of Procedure.

Because the 4th Overall Pick Is, After All, the Coolest Teenager in the World.

The game: Portland Winterhawks 3, Red Deer 2. Portland Winterhawks 4, Everett Silvertips 2. Squeakers all around, thanks to NHL Draftees Taylor Aronson (OT goal in the Red Deer game) and Brad Ross/Ryan Johansen/Nino Niederreiter (Brad got the game winner against Everett, Nino and Ryan helped and then Ryan topped it off with an empty netter).

As for that headline: The Everett game was stopped about 2 minutes in when two Silvertips players collided with each other on open ice. Medical personnel were called to the scene once it was clear he wasn't getting up or moving a whole lot. To ensure that one of them didn't fall while walking across the ice, Ryan skated over and took his arm to escort him out to the scene. If you've seen the post over on oregonlive, forgive me for duplicating with the audience here: behind the great playmaking is a great player. Get ready Columbus, it won't be long before you see what I'm talking about.

Road trip: Here in Portland, darkness is coming early due to the end of daylight savings time, coupled with rain and two weeks without any home games. While life on the home front is admittedly dreary, somewhere out there rolling down I-5, is a gaggle of young hockey players heading to Canada for a 3000+ mile road trip and all the adventure that comes with it. The Winterhawks sparkle on the road, and they head out on an eight-game winning streak. The recent return of Nino Niederreiter just puts the cherry on top of the whole thing. Times like these only come once, and one would hope that in ten years when they are still plenty young and off in the NHL or wherever fate leads them that they remember well what Portland taught them. I have had the pleasure of meeting most of them, and I know that they will.

That took long enough: Pittsburgh beat Phoenix last night in a shootout. Doing the game winning goal honors was Mark Letestu. A small glimmer of hope in a not terribly hopeful road trip. Here's my theory: one of the great things about the Penguins is that they play, lose and fight as a team. Sidney Crosby's generosity on and off the ice is well documented and rarely disputed. But the side effect of playing like one person is that when one or two players are sidelined, it's like all of them are. With Jordan Staal's injury, the team was dealt another blow just before leaving for a road trip. They had no time to absorb it or deal with it. Just get on the plane and good luck. That's no excuse for the middling play that marred their recent games, but it was cause for reflection on tonight's morals of the story.

But first, the rule: NHLPA Collective Bargaining Agreement, Article 12, Salary Arbitration.

12.3, Eligibility for Club-Elected Salary Arbitration: If a player has a Paragraph 1 NHL Salaries plus Signing, Roster and Reporting Bonuses Greater than $1,500,000 in the Prior League Year, the Club may elect salary arbitration for said salaries, etc in lieu of making an offer for the upcoming League Year. And if it goes to arbitration, the arbitrator may not award less than 85% of the Player's salaries, bonuses, etc, in the final League Year of his most recent SPC.

Morals of the story:

The game: When you make between eight and oh, say, $10 million a year, is 85 percent really so bad?

Life: This rule is all about what a player is worth to his employer. Ryan Johansen and his teammate Nino Niederreiter are worth just under one million dollars to their respective NHL teams. But back here, we don't place a dollar value on them and when they have moved on to their well-deserved professional careers, no amount of money could compensate for their loss. Jordan Staal's value to the Pens goes beyond his salary: it's key to the heart of the team.

Which brings me to this: why is it that we determine our worth in life by material worth? Generations before us survived the great depression, but we flip out if we can't own the latest iPhone-like gadget or a bank won't float a loan anymore for that McMansion we can't really afford. Material worth is important when it comes to salary, since that is how an employer demonstrates your value to them and how we pay the rent. But it's what they do with it that causes some people to lose the plot. Nobody needs expensive cell phones, a pimped up ride with all the bells and whistles or radiant heat on their floors to show others how important they are.

Therefore: I propose that Club Elected salary arbitration be allowed in every Fortune 500 company in America, so all those VPs who got to the corner office on a wing and a prayer can be put in their places every now and again. Only in my book, I wouldn't be as generous as 85 percent. I'd go for, oh...I don't know....say...fifteen percent, tops. Any sum that would require said individuals to sell the Jag, the McMansion and rent a small house within their actual budgetary means will do. If it works for the NHL, then it should work for everyone else.

Up next: Finding something to do with the next two weeks of my life while the Hawks hit the road. And 12.7, Scheduling.

When In Doubt, Follow the Lead of the 4th Overall Pick in the 2010 NHL Entry Draft.

The game: LA vs. Tampa Bay.

Why I chose it: This time, it's honkin' tall French Captain and Slovenian alternate Captain staring each other down the barrel of a hockey gun. Plus, Guy Boucher looks like he's going to eat a Ref for dinner, if Steve Downie doesn't beat him to it.

I'm following Ryan Johansen's lead: When his mom told me where he got his ambition and drive for success, she told me simply that growing up he was "always, always, always" about hockey.

I'm following his fine example this weekend as I indulge in the last of a 6-game homestand before the Hawks hit the road: www.oregonlive.com/hawks. On tap this weekend is a game between the Portland Winterhawks (#1 in the U.S. Division) and the Red Deer Rebels (owned by Brent Sutter, #2 in the Central Division). Followed on Saturday by a matchup with the Everett Silvertips. Stay tuned.

When I'm not doing that, we'll get back to topic with: Article 12, Salary Arbitration. 12.3, Eligibility for Club-Elected Salary Arbitration.

Go Ahead, Whine About Your Multimillion Dollar Salary..the NHL Dares You.

The games: Anaheim vs. Tampa Bay. Dallas vs. Pittsburgh.

Why I chose them: It's Honkin' Tall French Captain and cutie pie Swiss goalie staring each other down the barrel of a hockey gun. Why not watch it?

An evil comeback plan has been hatched in Tampa: And I like it. And did you notice that the combination of holding a master's degree in sports pychology and having an unexplained scar on his face just makes Guy Boucher more of an evil genius that other NHL teams should fear? Discuss.

Ok, that's it, the Pens are officially annoying me: I know Staal's down and all, but really, get it together dudes. I just grew a new gray hair. Scratch that, I'm pretty sure I'm up to three. Stop, already. On the other hand: No sooner did Dallas Captain and former Portland Winterhawks Brenden Morrow drop the mitts than Sidney Crosby followed suit. And Crosby does not screw around when he goes at it. He just starts and doesn't stop until the other guy goes down. They may be losing the game, but damn sure he's not gonna lose the fight.

It's going to be a long, quiet flight to the next gig: With 14 minutes to go, it's Dallas 5, Pittsburgh 1.

The rule: NHLPA Collective Bargaining Agreement, Article 12, Salary Arbitration.

12.1 (a) A player is eligible for salary arbitration if the Player meets the qualifications set forth in the following chart and in Section 12.1 below: Players who are 18 - 20 must have 4 years of professional experience. Players who are 21 years of age must have 3 years of professional experience. Players ages 22 - 23 must have 2 years of professional experience. Players 24 and older must have one year of professional experience. "Professional experience" qualifies as 10
games or more in a given season.

Morals of the story:

The game: So why is it then, that the players who need more experience to qualify for salary arbitration are the ones least likely to get it and the ones who need less will have easily qualified? Oh. Wait a minute. Ok. I get it. In other aspects of life, I believe we call it seniority.

Life: I grew up in old fashioned household, where elders were respected and if you were young and stepped out of line, somebody was there to remind you that you didn't know diddly and that my grandparents walked 7 miles uphill in the snow with the dog just to get to the little two-room schoolhouse with no heat and a teacher who rapped your knuckles with a ruler if you misbehaved, so I could just suck whatever it was I was whining about right up. That's kind of what this rule is. The younger and sassier you are, the less chance you have to complain that the $50 million deal plus bonuses and quality time on ice just isn't quite cutting it. Works for me.

Next up: Article 12, Salary Arbitration. 12.3, Eligibility for Club-Elected Salary Arbitration.

Back to NHL Topic 11.15

The game: New Jersey vs. Vancouver.

Why I chose it: It's Olympians Brodeur and Luongo at opposite ends of the rink. What other reason do you need?

In my case the other reason is Zach Parise: But mini bummer alert...he's down with a knee injury.

Alas it's not the luckiest of weeks for NHL superstars, therefore: I'm giving the Pens a break. Jordan Staal, mere days before his anticipated return from a gruesome foot infection, is now out with a broken hand. Talk about a bad break...quite literally and otherwise. On the other hand the team has several league leaders in hits, points and goals-against-average, and is known for stepping up when one of their own goes down. All the more reason to wish them well and mark the calendar for Staal's triumphant return later this season.

And I'm not the only fan of Portland Winterhawk Ian Curtis: oregonlive.com has been kind enough to welcome me into the community blog space that I now share with Dylan Bumbarger. Dylan's posted a really cool piece about Ian's contribution to the Winterhawks while he played out here: http://tinyurl.com/26e7kpr.

The New Year's Eve game to which Dylan refers is my favorite local sports moment ever. And it's definitely in my top three sports moments of all time. Period. No exceptions. We will be watching and waiting to see where Ian lands. If it doesn't involve an organization whose name ends in HL, maybe it's all just a sign...like say, he should go be a rock star (see previous entry).

Ok, I guess I'll try to understand the CBA, seeing as how I don't have anything else to do tonight: 11.15, Default. If a Club defaults in the payment of any compensation to the Player provided for in his SPC or fails to perform any other obligation under his SPC, the Player may, by notice in writing to the Club and to the League and the NHLPA, specify the nature of any and all defaults and thereafter: I didn't quite get all the "thereafters" but as far as I can tell, if the Club and the League can't figure out how to pay you because they agreed to pay you some huge amount of money like...say...$100 million over several decades...and it didn't quite go according to plan because they couldn't put butts in seats and make back the money...you're screwed.

Morals of the story:

The game: Just because they're supposed to pay you more money than God on paper, doesn't mean they will. Get an entourage my little rookies, and include in it an accountant, a lawyer and another lawyer in case the first one turns out to be an asshole. You'll thank me later.

Life: This rule is proof that even huge, organized, professional sports in America can get in over their heads financially and default on basic things like player salaries. But this is America, after all, where we can just vote to have Congress bail us out of our next big mistake that we won't have to worry about because it will be paid off by several future generations to come. Forget the default rule. In life, we need the almost default rule, in which our bank machine goes off like a car alarm if we even attempt to go up and withdraw a cash amount that leaves us with just enough to get to the next paycheck. And if we try to use a credit card because we don't have enough to cover it with cash, a huge crane should just fall out of the sky no matter where we are and snatch it right out of our hands.

Next up: Article 12, Salary Arbitration.